"Chaos you it's get it berk
"Ît's bÈr|< Xa0s!"
"Dabus! Subades is reprENSTATIVE
of XAoS with OBSUREC SPEAK!"
"Soax is berk chaos it!"
"Yeah, sure. I'm not going to
start talking weird like sense talking because makes no that."
"lEt's attackkkk the Hardheads!"
"Oh, please, you people, people!
Obscuring language doesn't make anything more chaotic or less chaotic! Strange
speak doesn't work! Let's go drop bird eggs from the Sigilian trees in the Hive
- A Xaositect fed up with the rest of the his group, although apparently unaware
that there aren't really any trees in the Hive Ward. It doesn't matter; the
group went down to the Lady's Ward, stole everyone's hats, paraded around town
with them for a while then distributed them back to their proper owners
The Xaositects (or Xaosmen,
Chaosmen, etc., as you like it) are truly loose cannons of Sigil. What they're
going to do next is never known, if only for the premise on which their faction
is based: the multiverse is chaos. Chaos. Nothing makes sense. There is nothing
that can bring order to the chaos that exists everywhere, there is no way to
herd the glory of XoAs into a ranks and files. Chaos is beautiful. Chaos is
glorious. Chaos is perfect in its disorder. The Xaositects usually wear colorful
clothes, walk around speaking perfect gibberish, and then cheerfully break any
roles assigned to them, including ones already defined to in this sentence. When
given a choice between two things, they'll do a third. When they are expected to
do one thing, they will do the opposite. It's chaos. Their factol is such that
his actions from one second to the next are thoroughly unrelated, and he has
honed himself to the point where the innate order in a person's thought has
almost disintegrated from his thought processes. He is walking chaos
personified, and it's goes unargued that he's one of the most chaotic mortals in
the multiverse. His name is Karan (most of the time) and he's a githzerai from
Limbo, and its said that he can shape chaos stuff into... even more chaotic
stuff. You were expecting order?
In Sigil, the Xaositects mostly
go around doing whatever they want. Mostly, they're unified by their hatred of
the Harmonium and the other order groups in Sigil, but that's not a given at
all, since what one Xaositect things one minute is almost always different from
second to second. Their minds dance and freely associate from topic to topic,
rarely staying in one place long enough to take root. Their headquarters is in
the Hive Ward of Sigil and is called, imaginatively enough, "The Hive." It's
like a maze, an anthill with a thousand turns... while the rest of the Ward may
be confusing, it's not The Hive. The Hive isn't a place that people go
for fun or to do something constructive at all: it is a place where the
population is almost completely Xaositects, and those non-Xaositects are fair
game while within its twisting streets to almost anything imaginable.
Scary clowns with leering faces,
artists that fling their paint all over the canvas, people that try too hard to
be random... these are the Xaosmen, some of the time. Other times, they're
different... consistency? What's that? Why would you expect the Xaosmen to be
the same from time to time?
The trick for a Xaosman, of
course, is to become at one with the disorder of the multiverse. One cannot try
too hard to be random and disordered, because that's not chaos. Neither is chaos
always random... sometimes a Xaosman will just show up and start speaking
normal, just to confuse you. The best Xaositects seem to have a knack for
knowing exactly what you expect of them... and then doing something else.
The Xaositects do
whatever they feel like doing, and what they feel like doing varies from one
moment to the next. They don't hold permanent positions and end up wandering
Sigil doing whatever they feel like. Some of their outlets end up being in the
arts, and they create either works of incredible beauty or works of incredible
ugliness: it's never consistent. As a general rule, the Xaositects are never
consistent: they do whatever they want to, whenever they want to, and nobody
gets in their way. Jobs? Xaosmen can't hold jobs. It's against their very
nature. Most end up doing something against Sigilian law and hunted down by the
Harmonium or Mercykillers to have their sentence administered. Some of the most
bloodthirsty and dangerous criminals have been Xaosmen, which serves as a
warning to everyone.
The Revolutionary League sees the
Xaosmen as easily manipulated puppets to be exploited to further the goals of
the Revolution. The Xaosmen like the Anarchists too, probably because there's
always disorderly fun to be had when the Revolutionary League is around.
The Bleakers get along with the
Xaosmen because both groups can easily see that the multiverse makes no orderly
sense. The Xaosmen just take it a step further than that into the utter belief
(and almost worship) of the chaos inherent within.
The Doomguard likes the
Xaositects in the same way as the Revolutionary League does: the Xaosmen are
easily manipulated into overt acts of violence and disorder because of their
The Indeps, because of their
hatred of the Harmonium, usually gets along with the Xaositects, if only because
of a common hatred.
None of the law
factions (the Harmonium, Mercykillers, and Fraternity of Order) can stand the
Xaositects. While the Harmonium is more active in searching them out, it's the
Fraternity of Order that can't stand them. Because the Fraternity of Order
believes in the perfection of law and the Xaositects believe in the glory of
chaos, it's about as opposite as things are going to get.